5 Life-Changing Reasons To Stop Making Assumptions Today

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This post is a The Four Agreements summary. Specifically, it is a summary of Chapter 4: The Third Agreement.

The Four Agreementswas written by Don Miguel Ruiz. This chapter summary has been created using Sam Fury’s personal notes with the help of AI.

Download the complete summary via the SF Nonfiction Books library. Click Here for FREE access.

We all do it…

We all assume things. 

We fill in the blanks. 

We decide what someone meant, what they think, or how they’ll react, without ever asking.

And that one tiny habit creates more drama, pain, and misunderstanding than almost anything else in life.

Here’s why breaking it can completely change your world.

Contents

1. Assumptions Create Unnecessary Drama

Most of the sadness and conflict we’ve lived through began with a simple assumption.

We assume, we misunderstand, we take things personally, and suddenly there’s a full-blown story playing out in our heads.

But that story is rarely accurate. 

Unfortunately, since we believe our assumptions are real, we act on them and spiral deeper into confusion and hurt.

2. Gossip Feeds The Poison

When we make assumptions, we often talk about them with others.

That’s how gossip spreads. Not based on truth, but on imagined stories.

Gossip transfers emotional “poison.” It spreads misunderstanding and judgment.

If we want peace, we have to stop assuming and start asking instead.

3. Relationships Suffer Most

Assumptions are a silent destroyer in relationships.

We assume our partner knows what we want. We think they should “just know.” And when they don’t, we feel hurt and say, “You should have known.”

Real connection requires clarity.

Say what you mean. Ask what they need. Don’t expect anyone to read your mind.

4. Love Doesn’t Need To Change Anyone

One of the most painful assumptions is believing your love can change another person.

It can’t.

Real love accepts people exactly as they are.

If someone wants to change, they will because they choose to, not because of you.

The same goes for you. Find someone who doesn’t need to change you either.

When both sides accept each other fully, love finally feels easy.

5. Clarity Brings Freedom

Freedom begins with communication.

If something isn’t clear, ask.

If you don’t understand, ask again.

Asking questions instead of assuming clears the fog and keeps your mind calm.

You have the right to ask for what you want, and others have the right to say yes or no. That’s how relationships stay honest, respectful, and drama-free.

The Real Transformation

Information alone doesn’t change your life: action does.

Every time you choose to ask instead of assume, you strengthen your clarity muscle.

Over time, it becomes your default way of living. A way of living that’s grounded in truth, peace, and freedom.

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Download Sam’s detailed summary of The Four Agreements in its entirety. Click Here for FREE access.

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